Seattle’s Love Lab: Can Marriage Education Prevent Divorce?
Through years of observing couples – both couples in successful marriages and couples that end their relationship with divorce – John Gottman and his researchers say they can now predict whether or not a marriage will last with a 90 percent accuracy rate. He uses that information to help teach couples how to better communicate, both through workshops and books.
According to a recent article in the Washington Post, marriage education may be the next step for couples trying to make their relationships last. The government is even giving some couples – like those with one or more spouse in the armed services – free workshops to keep marriages strong. Much of the research shows that marriages don’t end because of stress, money, or other irreconcilable differences (they have found that all marriages include irreconcilable differences), marriages end because couples do not know how to properly argue with each other, which can lead to contempt and resentment.
Two suggestions Gottman has for all couples? Empathy – putting yourself in your partner’s shoes – and parroting – repeating how your partner feels about an issue back to your partner, and vice versa, until you both understand the other’s thoughts.
Molly B. Kenny's Bellevue family law office is conveniently located on Lake Bellevue Drive, making it easily accessible to those in the greater Seattle area. Our divorce and child custody lawyers help men and women get the information, guidance, and compassionate representation they need.